Zoom Out

Here on Thanksgiving, I find myself zooming out and realizing how short sighted I've been.

We've had some irritating events recently, including (but not limited to):

- Neil needing medication and an MRI, now possibly injections for severe sciatica
- Expensive issues with my car which are now having to be re-done, and we have to pay double for
- Benni had 5 tumors removed, one of which was cancerous and then he didn't heal and needed a second surgery

These events have taken a lot of time, heartache, money and energy out of us both, and it seems like just when we get one thing under control, something else happens or the same issue resurfaces. When it rains, it pours. Then, a good friend reminded me how to use my zoom. It's easy to stay so focused on the bad of the moment that you forget how bad it really could be. I see patients every day dealing with horrendous conditions ON TOP OF their cancer. It's just one way I keep a close finger on my zoom button. How selfish of me to even attempt to feel sorry for myself. I have more than anyone deserves, we all do. So, here is a small sampler of what I am thankful for.

- I am thankful we sold our house in a flailing market
- I am thankful Benni has clear margins in his tumor removal
- I am thankful Neil's sciatica is getting better without injections
- I am thankful I turned 30, yes, I am thankful for it
- I am thankful we have each other, and are laughing through the bad
- I am thankful for both of us having jobs
- I am thankful we have wonderful families that live close
- I am thankful for the upcoming holidays
- I am thankful for my beautiful daughter who always makes me laugh
- I am thankful that God is always watching over me and is on my side
- I am thankful right this second for a good cup of coffee and a little girl who is waiting on me to cook with her.

So, my lesson learned it to always keep my finger on the zoom, because sometimes if you focus too close you miss the big picture.

Gimme' that Wank

Does anyone remember that country song? I used to know all the words. It's okay, I'm not embarassed.

Weekend Travel

This past weekend, we headed to Myrtle Beach for a dear friend's wedding. Kim has a very special love story, and we were honored to be there to share in her special day. Kim looked so beautiful and happy, and that attitude was contagious! I really hate I did not take any pictures with Kim. When behind a camera, I never make it into pictures, and one way of keeping an eye on Olivia is to take pictures of her, ha ha.

We stayed at the beach with "Yaya" (Caroline) and "Baby Kafrine" (Katherine) and had a great time.



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Birthday Girl

It's hard to believe, but our little monkey turned 3. I feel like there is a big change from 2 to 3 years old. She certainly isn't a baby anymore, but she's not really a toddler anymore. She talks and carries on conversations like a 6 year old. She puts stuff together and calls me out on things I'm doing wrong. She role plays with her figurines and makes jokes. She is suddenly much more social and will talk to people if I okay them. She plays with her friends and has silly little girl conversations. Basically, she is tons of fun, and I love hearing her little mind run wild with imagination.

On her actual birthday, we had a quiet evening just the 3 of us. We went to dinner, we got her a cupcake with a candle, we sang and opened presents. It was awesome.





Friday and Saturday, Grandpa, Cici, Aunt Ragan and Uncle Lucas came all the way from NJ. We had a great time visiting with them, and it never seems like enough time. We relaxed and hung out together, and of course, I forgot to take any pictures.




Sunday, we had a mini birthday party at our house with family and friends. Just some dinner, cake and presents were all we needed to have a good time.




Here are more pictures if you want to see all the festivites in full:

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Some other notes:

Benni had 5 tumors removed Monday. He is recovering well, and two of the lumps were sent of to pathology because they are suspicious. We'll see what they are in another week or so. He has lots of bald spots with huge Frankenstein incisions.

I tried to explain to Olivia what being thankful is. Once she seemed to get the concept, she listed out what she was thankful for. Mommy, Daddy, Benni....apples, bananas, spoons, forks....bugs, worms, pillows....toys, princesses, Ariel, earrings...and my personal favorite...screwdrivers. Ha ha ha.

Trick or Treat

Olivia had an awesome Halloween as Tinkerbelle. Sugar is something I limit from Olivia, but c'mon on Halloween at nearly 3 years old, chocolate is in!! How can you let a kid go trick-or-treating and not eat their loot? She really got into it this year and wanted to go by herself door-to-door. The only unfortunate part was that our new neighborhood is very old which leads to rooty and uneven walkways. We had one good knee skinner, but other than that, the booty hunt went great! By the time we put Olivia to bed at 9:30, she had eaten more chocolate than she'd even seen in a long time. The result was that when I went to check on her at 10:45, she was laying quietly in her bed with huge owl eyes looking around the room and holding her glow-stick bracelets she got at one house. My little raver had looped them all together into one big "O" which she then used as a steering wheel. I explained to her that chocolate has sugar and caffeine which makes you not tired. She then proceeded to talk my ear off for 30 minutes and need a snack because she was "hungry and drinky." We had a good time, and she did eventually go to sleep, although she got up at 6.

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Pause Button

I'm pretty sure Olivia's soft little kisses on the cheek are a tiny piece of Heaven broken off and given to me as a teaser. I feel her little hand on my back or neck as she stops me in my tracks. I hear her little breath tickle my face as she mixes the perfect amount of soft little baby lips against my cheek with a sweet *smack* at the end. She pulls away, quite proud of her perfect pucker and then runs along.

I feel like time stops for that fraction of a second, sometimes longer if I'm lucky. I get them totally undeservingly at times; when I'm frustrated, tired, running around, etc. It's like her little unprovoked reminder to me to slow down. I try not to ask for these little kisses often because when they are her idea it just makes it that much sweeter. We had photos taken tonight at the park, and Olivia gave me a "pause button kiss" on the cheek. I hope one of these pictures will freeze my perfect puckerer and my bliss together.

At dinner afterwards, Olivia sat coloring and listening to Neil and I talk. She politely interrupted, "Mommy, nobody wants to hear you talk with food in your mouth. That's not good manners." Gotta love my little perfectionist.

Tap Tap Tap Along

We let Olivia try dance last Saturday and she LOVED it. I think she's a natural...of course.

no pesticides

After work, we like to sit outside. Lately, O loves to take her gardening spray bottle and spritz random things in the yard...the chairs, my feet, Benni. Here she said, "these ouchie things is firsty." She wanted to wear her monk too.

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Summer

Click Here for Pics From Summer Fun

Indulgences

It is rare, but some weekends we are home with nothing we have to do, nowhere to be, nobody is coming.

I have a guilty pleasure on these days. I take a nap with Olivia. It is awesome. We get in my bed and giggle, swapping silly stories until I have to tell Monk-monk to wind down and take a nap.

Sometimes I wake up before her and this is what I get to stare at like the creepy stalker mom in the book, "I Love You Always." If she wakes up first, monk-monk usually attacks me, or starts singing to me.

I hope we have nothing to do tomorrow too. And if we do, I might just ignore it.

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A Regular Comedian

After work today, I took Olivia to get her hair cut. She was sitting in the little taxi cab at the kids salon, wearing her "watch" as seen in this picture. It is really just a plush princess on a felt slap bracelet. She kept asking for a sucker she saw in the jar on the counter. The girl cutting her hair kept saying, ok, when we're all done, almost done. Finally, to distract her, the girl asked her what she had on her wrist. Olivia replied, "my watch." I asked her what time it was, to which she replied, "time for a sucker."

After the salon, I had to run to CVS. In the store, she was going bonkers and I was quickly trying to grab what I needed and get out of there. When I was ready to go to checkout, I said, OK Olivia, let's go, c'mon hurry! She then yelled, "OK Mommy, we got to hurry!!! Is your poo-poo coming out now!?"

Lastly, deadpan humor. She's been going through some major whining lately, for e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. It has been driving us quite crazy. We were playing puzzles quietly tonight, and I said seriously, Olivia, why do you cry a lot instead of talking to mommy when you need something? She stopped, looked at me, and just said, "Because I'm a spider." Done, no silly giggle, just shut it lady, 'cuz I want to!

My Friend

Random pic of Olivia happily modeling her Lightning McQueen Silly Bands from Uncle Nini and Hayyay.

So, Sunday night I tucked her in bed, followed the usual routine and went to kiss my punkin head goodnight. She whispered, "guess what?" What sweetie. "I love you." Could it get better? Yes. "Guess what?" (Again, whispered) What doodlebug? "I your friend Mommy." You sure are, my love.

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what does mommy do at work?

So today, I got Olivia for lunch and brought her to show off at my work and eat with her. She did really good and it was a lot of fun because for the first time she wasn't afraid of people she didn't know and talked. A coworker asked Olivia what her mommy does at work and she replied, "play with her friends." They laughed and kept asking her, and each time her reply was the same, "play with her friends." I reminded her of what I do at work...help sick people. After I took her back to daycare to take a nap, I walked in my office and a different coworker threw a pop-it firecracker at the wall causing me to scream. Olivia is wise beyond her 2 years.

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Catch Up - I don't know where to start.

Let's see, so much has been going on, and I don't think I could blog about all of it. In a nutshell, the past two months have held the following excitement among other things...

1. Olivia broke Neil's nose

2. Olivia/I dislocated Olivia's elbow

3. I studied my butt off and took my boards for the MDCB (Medical Dosimetrist Certification Board), and won't know if I passed or failed until mid-August

4. Neil has started happily riding his bike again, even though it is smokin' hot outside

5. Neil's brother Carl got engaged!! We are so excited and happy for he and Katie.

6. We put our house back on the market this past weekend officially and have had three showings so far. We are trying not to get our hopes up, but really really really want to move closer to work.

7. We got to meet up with the Browning's in the "mainland" from Hawaii. So much fun to see Brandi and James, plus their three kids.

8. Olivia finally mastered pooping on the potty which was a big deal. The battle was won by many bribes that I used to swear I was above.

I have random pictures on multiple cameras, but here is a link to some from a weekend in May when it was Landon's prom. Well, it was his third prom, his gf's Senior year one. I wish I had loaded up all new pictures, but our laptop is on the fritz and I'm still trying to work out the bugs.

Sitting at dinner the other night, Neil asked Olivia how her day was. She answered with a sassy, "what what what you say!?" Neil told her that wasn't nice for her to talk like that. Her reply was, "But I'm so cute." Another bad parenting moment for me as I busted out laughing.

Picasa Web Album

Study?

How am I supposed to study when this adorable monkey wants to play...? Screw the books.

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I'm not slack, just insane right now.

Relisting our house and studying for my boards has taken any blogging time from my life. I promise to return after June 13th. Until then...

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Published with Blogger-droid

Princess Mater

Easter

We had such a wonderful Easter holiday with a dozen egg hunts. Olivia had a great time, although was a little scared by the thought that the Easter bunny had been in the house, candy or not.



The Wagstaffs were down from NJ to visit and it was great to see them even if only for a day. We relaxed, shopped and hid Easter eggs. What a great weekend!




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So Much to Catch Up On!

Oh my, there is so much to catch up on suddenly. I have spent three days trying to unpack, organize and now upload and comment on picture from our vacation.

Here's a rundown of recent happenings:

• The passy is officially gone. One night, I told Olivia that when you are a big girl, your passy's break. I snipped the end of one so that it lost suction. She asked for it, tried it, and said, "Mommy...passy's brokey?" Yes baby, it's brokey. She responds with, "It's okay, Mommy fix it wif tape." No baby, tape won't fix it. "Wif glue?" No sweety, it's just brokey, all gone. "Okay. Monkey no brokey?" Nope, monkey is just fine. "Okay." That was the last time she used one. She reminds herself sometimes when she's going to sleep, "passy's brokey."

• "MY DO IT!!!!" There were days where I thought hearing "mommy" 230 times in an hour was excessive. Now, it's "MY DO IT!" This refers to anything and everything Olivia is involved in from getting undressed or dressed, up and down stairs, in and out of the car, doing the buckle, and on and on and on. This would be great if she could do all those things, but usually it just ends with her getting really frustrated and screaming at inanimate objects. Something else she got from me.

• Potty Training! - Has been so incredibly easy I feel like a black hole might suck me up for even typing that. I had such skewed perceptions about potty training and how difficult it would be, and here's what happened. I waited until she was ready. We skipped pull-ups and went straight to panties. After 2 accidents she started telling me when she had to go. She is fully pee-pee potty trained. The poo-poo monster is rearing it's ugly head though since Olivia refuses to eat most fruits and vegetables except bananas and potatoes. She has decided to hold it for 2-3 days and then run back and forth to the potty every 2 minutes until the poo-poo monster finally makes an appearance. We're getting there.

• We went to Disney World! Our family went to visit Andrea who lives in Orlando now, and made it a vacation to Disney at the same time. We had an absolutely wonderful time, and at the risk of sounding like a total dork...there really is something magic about Disney. I had such minimal expectations of the overly kiddie Disney, and could not have been happier or had more fun. Not just because we saw Olivia sooo excited, but also because it's just awesome. There's not really a good way to describe, you just have to go.

And just to add to my Disney dorkiness, click on Mickey for more pictures!!!!!

Painting the Princess

I would like to point out that I was not the first one to do it.

Valentine's and Snow Day

Daycare always has fun events for holidays, and we started last week with a Valentine's Day dance! Here Olivia gives friend Abi a squeeze. Believe it or not, Abi is only 3 months younger than Olivia. We have an ogre.

This weekend we finally got some of the snow everybody else has been playing in the for the past month. Granted it was gone by noon, we made the most of it for a few hours on Saturday. Here is our awesome snowman that fell over before Olivia got up from her nap.

Ama sent some V-day goodies that included pink chocolate chip pancake mix. I made Olivia a Minnie Mouse pancake which she clearly enjoyed. Here are more pictures from the happenings:

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I also took a few mini videos of the snow day. Olivia was cracking us up with all the funny things she comes up with.


In this first video, she keeps pretending to lose her balance. Neil and I keep saying we should have made her middle name be Drama.

I love this video simply because in the beginning you hear Olivia calling, "Neil!" I was calling him to stop scraping the driveway and come play with us, and of course, my mocking bird started calling him too.

Olivia enjoyed "hiding" behind this tree and at the very beginning you hear her ask for "one more." Then Neil actually hit her and it wasn't so fun anymore.

Louie and Layla playing in the backyard with Benni. They were hilarious and at one point we noticed that Layla was running with a rooster tail of snow behind her!

Olivia going to throw the ball with Neil and Aaron for all the pups.

Going to get the mail with me.
She was very proud of herself when she got to the top with her heels on.

I can't be the only one...can I?

I have made no qualms about the fact that I have suffered from baby/mom brain since pregnancy. Things just don't process as fast as they used to, or maybe they do, but my brain is so clogged up with other stuff that occasionally things get jumbled. Last week, Neil was in Las Vegas for the International Builders Convention. I was home alone Monday-Thursday which wasn't that big of a deal because he is out of the house for work from 6am-7pm anyways. Things went well all week, other than Olivia developing a bad chest cold and nasty cough, and was finishing up eye drops for pink-eye. Yet another fun thing Neil missed out on...holding down a 2 year old three times a day for eye drops. And then there was Thursday.

Thursday is trash day, cleaning lady day and we had an early morning procedure at work. Luckily my coworker Kim is awesome and often volunteers to do those cases, but I especially can't be late on those days. Neil usually takes the trash out so I was a little off after hauling our 2 huge rolling trashcans and recycling bin down our driveway. I had overslept some, showered and gotten ready, let Benni out and fed him, packed my lunch, left a check for the cleaners, got Olivia's milk and cheerios for the road and laid out our shoes and jackets...all by 6:45am. Can you hear me building my case?? I then went to get Olivia up and dressed. Once we got downstairs I had to gather some toys up for her because we were driving Neil's Camry instead of my car because I was getting new tires...my car has the DVD player and it's hard to occupy the mind of a 2 year old for a 45 minute commute without one! So, we finally get our jackets and shoes on, get the milk and cheerios, my coffee, lunch and purse and leave. Whew, 45 minutes later, we're at daycare. I quickly checked Olivia in and ran to work. I barely made it on time, and rushed into our morning meeting.

About 15 minutes into morning meeting the conference room phone started ringing. I had just been telling everyone how Olivia had a bad cough and it's so hard to know when to take them to the doctor. It was daycare calling. Uh oh, she's got a fever, threw up, got hurt...? I finally get to the phone, and it's Ms. Catherine, Olivia's teacher with me on speakerphone. As she always does, she immediately said, "It's okay, Olivia is fine." (Always a good idea when you're calling a parent) She continues, "Mom, I'm not complaining at all, I just want to make sure this isn't true and you don't have a mess on your hands. Olivia pooped and I went to change her and she didn't have a diaper on. She said she took it off in Mommy's car." My first thought was, oh shit (literally) Neil is going to kill me if there is a dirty diaper in his car. Then I quickly shuffle through the morning events and realize with horror...I NEVER PUT ONE ON HER!!!! How did I do that?? How did I not notice?? She walked everywhere and when I did put her in or out of the car, I picked her up by her armpits. I never felt the nakie bunkie! How embarrassing! Then I remember that Catherine had said she pooped. I confessed my act of negligence to Catherine and said I couldn't believe the poop didn't fall out her pants. She said, "Oh it did...the kids kicked it around a little bit." Seriously!? Is it not bad enough that I forgot her diaper, and then she pooped and now the kids played hacky-sac with the turd?? Could that be any worse? Apparently so, because Catherine said the only change of clothes I had there for Olivia was a pair of capri pants which shouldn't be a problem except that Olivia is a diva and was freaking out because they didn't cover her princess boots. And then I just died laughing because what else could I do? I hear Catherine finally crack up laughing once she knew it was okay, as well as the other teachers in the room.

I have taken endless ridicule from not only the teachers, but also my coworkers who overheard this in the meeting. I made No-Bake cookies for the teachers as a thank you this week. Also known as Cow Pies! You gotta laugh at yourself.

And it begins...

No matter the fight I put up, it is happening. Olivia is becoming a girly girl, a princess, a diva if you will. Today is a yucky rainy day, with both she and Neil sick with coughs and myself with a splitting headache. Nothing will stop this princess though. And speaking of sick, here is another video of us yet again making cupcakes for something and Olivia with pink eye, now that's another story in itself.

BiG GiRL BeD

The title of this post has both big and little letters because that's how I feel about it. HIGH & low. It's not that she was crawling out of her bed that made it time, but more that I was having trouble getting her in and out of the crib at 30 lbs! On one hand, it is so cool because she was ecstatic about her big girl bed and readily crawled in and pretended to go to sleep. On the other hand...where is my tiny little baby!? It's cliche but true, they grow too fast. There are certain things neither of us are ready to give up yet, and one is rocking before bed, and her passy. We decided the passy can go when either she has all her teeth or is potty trained. Both are sneaking up on me. I will never stop rocking her as long as she'll let me. So after this video, we turned out the lights, snuggled up to rock with monk-monk and "papis" (passy), and sang our songs. She asked to get in her bed and I put her there and snuggled her in the new sheet and comforter. I walked out and closed the door waiting to hear little footsteps or a cry for mommy. No such luck. Darn that big girl!